I have a friend at work who's had a tough year. Her mother
suffered a sudden and unpredictable stroke and then spent over two months in
the hospital at first recovering and then declining. Her decline was
precipitated by a series of infections and while the Hospital (Johns Hopkins)
and her personal team of physicians were stellar. The shift from hope to
eventual loss was jarring and painful.
Now she works to engage her father--who was also assumed to
be the first one to pass into ancestry. He has been physically frail for
many years (while her mother was vibrant and active and fully engaged in a rich
community of friends and activities). How unpredictable life is.
To paint an even more nuanced picture of things, I will say
that her dad remains independent. He has occasional mishaps and she hopes to
help him relocate into a home more suited to his needs and closer to hers. He
lacks the regular social interactions that her mom provided, but he's also kind
of a happy to be a putzing around sorta guy. He's not afraid of challenges, yet
sometimes gets confused.
Fast forward to today. The topic: Does he need a pet? Her
daughter has it in her mind that he would benefit from keeping a tropical fish.
She thinks a betta would be a good fit. My friend, knowing that I have a couple
of tanks of tropical fish asked my thoughts on this. It's a really good
question. I like the overall concept. A beautiful companion that requires
little maintenance and would be interesting to study. Her dad was a
scientist/engineer in his former professional life.
But I thought that a pair of guppies would be a better fit.
Both betta and guppies don't need formal aquariums to thrive. You can nix the
crap like lights and heaters, etc. They will be happy enough in a bowl or even
funky glass vase with sufficient light and regular (a couple of times a week)
feeding of the flakes. They both do need--for it to work--the habitat to have
live plants and a gravel bed. Including a snail or two is also helpful in creating
and maintaining a healthy ecosystem. Lastly, you need to have a place were the
natural light will keep the plants alive.
Now, the reason I thought that guppies were a better option
is this. When you own a betta, you own ONE fish. When you have a pair of guppies,
you have TWO fish...I know, I'm starting to sound like Dr. Seuss! When one
betta dies--the whole world dies with it. However, when one guppy dies, you
morn the loss and find a new companion for the remaining fish. I told my friend
that the psychological difference in how these two inevitable events play out
might be really important in the life of her dad. Fish are going to die. And
you'll never know why. But if you can train your thoughts to comforting the
surviving "spouse," you will be able to maintain a positive
perspective on how you interact with your fish.
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